Unearthing Silver Linings

As the thanksgiving holiday draws near, I’m sure a lot of us are feeling exasperated because it will be a holiday like no other due to the pandemic.  Over the last few days, I’ve been trying to separate the silver lining from the heaviness that has been looming during the last 8 months.  And as you can imagine, it has given Den and I plenty to talk about while we continue to walk, hike, cook…

What I’ve personally observed…

Before the pandemic, certain aspects of my lifestyle were going overlooked.  Dennis and I didn’t think twice about going out to eat 2-3 times a week.  When they announced the lockdown, we were like everyone else and started rushing to figure out a way to survive without the delicious stuffed mushroom caps from Longhorn, the Oriental chicken salad from Applebee’s or the yummy butter and rolls at Texas Roadhouse.  What we noticed was an opportunity for personal growth while being saved from our frivolous spending habits. I began researching the foods that we craved and started to attempt to create them at home.  The outcome opened our eyes even more.  We found that we could control the quality of the dishes, save money and find a sense of accomplishment all at the same time. I’d say that’s a pretty good silver lining.

At the onset of the pandemic, I’m sure that all of us wondered how we were going to adapt to staying home for 5 weeks without the normal abilities to go out to eat, to workout at the gym or to go see a movie.  Den and I both were concerned especially for our girls who live in the city.  We could imagine busying ourselves with yard work or housework (there’s plenty of stuff to occupy our time even in the basement) but we couldn’t image how they were going to get thru those weeks.  With these ideas, it was easy to fall into a depressive state.  Subsequently what occurred was an opportunity to think outside the box.  We quickly figured out ways to exercise, socialize and entertain without putting ourselves and others in danger of the virus.  We brainstormed together to create memories of grandeur instead of doom.  Positive thoughts and mental clarity are the silver lining here.

Being sequestered at home made us view the belongings that we have in value, usability and whether we respect it or use it to our best ability.  Both Dennis and I are very impulsive while shopping.  I think that in the past, most of our purchases were made to either fill a void or create instant happiness.  This hiatus from shopping has taught us self worth and the value of minimalism.  It opened our eyes to how much we were wasting money on things we didn’t really need.  This enlightenment couldn’t have come at a better stage in our lives.  As empty nesters, downsizing is going to be one of the most difficult challenges.  This silver lining has opened our minds to the worth of individual emotional connection.  We revisited where we were emotional when we purchased certain things and let go of the hidden issue that made us “need” it.

I personally think one of the biggest silver linings of this whole situation for Dennis and I is personal connection and respect.  The heaviness of the pandemic weighed on us but when the political and human rights activism flared up, we were pressed into another opportunity for self growth.  I think over the course of our lives we have gotten comfortable moving along with blinders on.  I’m thankful for both of my children and their partners during this period of time.  They assisted us by having open discussion and gave us the room we needed to educate ourselves.  In turn what happened was not just seeing ourselves grow in humanity but see our children develop into empathetic adults.  All of these discussions have also helped our relationship because as we talk about all kinds of stories, scenarios and anecdotes, we continue to see the morals and values that brought us together in the first place.

Look for silver linings.  Even on darkest days, you will find them.  All you have to do is look.— Elizabeth Messina